Mod Report: Week 324 (Year 7, Week 12)

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This topic contains 3 replies, has 4 voices, and was last updated by  K-16 1 year, 5 months ago.

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  • #171613

    aughts
    Keymaster

    Mod Report Corporate would like to apologize for last week’s… misstep, and reassure our fans that the Mod Report you know and love will return.

    This summer.

    Mod v Report: Mod v Report Harder

    Boxes, Boxes As Far As The Eye Can See

    It’s just a small thing, but here’s a 2-minute, bite-sized update on Fraser and Becky’s moving situation. Basically: it’s still happening.

    And just a reminder to people: seriously, this is a time of flux for every part of the show. If there was ever a time for discussing how the show just ‘isn’t how you remember it’, well, yeah. We’re in upheaval mode right now. It’s kinda expected. We’re all just gonna have to get past it.

    Every Tuesday, Friday, and Sunday! – Official TURBO TF2 Schedule!
    Every Thursday and Saturday! – Unofficial PS4 Overwatch Schedule! (TURBOs Only)
    Monday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Saturday! – Unofficial PC Overwatch Schedule!

    When in doubt, blame Ace.
    Illiterate Sophist: I am more medicine than man.
    Quazi: Some Say when he coughs, he emits a Vicks® VapoRub™ vapour , and when he lactates, pepto bismol comes out.
    Illiterate Sophist: I punch people who say that.
    Illiterate Sophist: Feebly, because I have a temperature of 5,000.
    Syretha: mmm cherry flavoured man milk
    Illiterate Sophist: Welcome to next week’s mod report.
    Syretha: Ace made me say it!
    Aqws: What is going on here

    Cards she can abide, but gifts? Are you mad?
    ATrulyAmazingToaster: NO ONE BETRAY ME
    Quazi: I need someone who is friends with Atru
    Quazi: on steam
    ATrulyAmazingToaster: DO NOT DO IT
    Quazi: I need to send you something to send to Atru
    Quazi: She has made this a thing
    ATrulyAmazingToaster: YOU DO NOT WANT MY WRATH UPON YOU
    Quazi: I need to send someone a gift card to redirect to her
    Illiterate Sophist: Why aren’t you friends?
    ATrulyAmazingToaster: Because he would give me things
    Aqws: You are a bad friend atru

    On this day in multimedia, THERE IS ONLY ADORABLE. A spider? Boom, ADORABLE. A cat? Boom, ADORABLE (and currently being translated at a rate of about one comic a day). Hoodie Dragons? Boom, ADORABLE!

    Sy’s cookie jar? Boom, ADORABLE.

    Choose your favourite starter and set off on your journey to catch ’em all, as we tune into the Chocolate Chip-Tune Cookie Jar.

    This week we begin what I hope to be an ongoing retrospective at the at the chip-tune tracks of Pokémon Red and Blue versions. These twin games were enjoyed by many children, growing up in the 1990s (myself included), with future editions to the series playing much the same role for the generations of kids that followed. Pokémon Red/Blue incorporated mechanics of exploration, battling, collecting, and puzzle solving, which made the game highly addictive and time consuming.

    While I could go on longer, discussing the various aspects of the game(s), our focus is to be narrowed onto the purpose of this article: the music. We shall now begin our examination for the Pokemon Red/Blue Soundtrack, starting with “Title Screen”, composed by Junichi Masuda.

    The track opens with dynamic cords, conveying a sense that a battle is already underway. This intro soon concludes on a final high note, as if the winning blow has been struck, opening up the game to the body of the track, with the tempo leveling out to a steady pace. The track fills us with a sense of adventure and wonder, the player readies themselves to strike out on their digital journey into the Kanto region. There is much promise in the melody that excitement and challenges of varying degrees lies ahead, but the constant underlying drumbeat encourages the player to boldly march forward and show no fear. Interludes of the sounds of battle interject the track, foreshadowing to the encounters with other trainers, and wild Pokémon, which are often randomly occurring.

    Let this track pump you up before you press start and begin your journey!

    Since ISo’s recovered, time for the next installment of Adventure AWESOME! The results of two weeks ago were:

     1. “I’ll help!” – 0
     2. Get angry, run to the refrigerator, ruin as much as possible. – 0
     3. “I believe I asked for more knives.” – 5

    Meaning the winner was ‘Wait, wait. I’m worried what you just heard was, ‘Give me a lot of knives.’ What I said was, ‘Give me all the knives you have.’ Do you understand?’. Enjoy this week’s installment!

    “I believe I asked for more knives,” Al stated.

    The man stammered and flailed his arms before ripping out a counter drawer and throwing it in the air. A drawerful of knives rained down on the floor and counter, several sticking into the wood dangerously close to the cat and baby, who didn’t seem to mind terribly much.

    “There! Knives!” the man shouted. “Now, get out of my kitchen!”

    Al takes a knife in each hand, smiles at the cat, and walks out.

     1. Leave the house.
     2. Go back to the living room.
     3. Don’t get out of the kitchen.

    Meanwhile, in an alternate universe…

    Time for the next installment of Adventures AWESOME! Last week’s results were:

     1. Hold as still as possible. – 2
     2. Leap out of the way. – 1
     3. Uncaringly argue further with the man. – 1

    Meaning the winner was ‘Await our bladed bounty!’. And remember, I have definitely NOT murdered ISo, but will be continuing the story in his stead. All on the up and up, I assure you. …Enjoy this week’s installment!

    Al sucked in her breathed, slammed her eyes shut, and stayed as still as possible, hoping the expected knives would simply avoid her as they made their way to ground. After all, surely they would realize that is the optimum outcome for everyone involved.

    “My fondant!” the man shouted.

    Al opened her eyes again, and rubbed a knot forming on the top of her head. Tubes of fondant lay around her, though for all she knew they may have been pastel-colored rods of iron. “That would explain the cake,” she muttered to her sore scalp. She knelt and picked up two tubes while the man scrambled, smiled at the cat, and walked out.

     1. Leave the house.
     2. Go back to the living room.
     3. Don’t get out of the kitchen.

    Come back next week when we acknowledge our newest ‘misstep’, and reassure once more that we’re going to be returning to our core values: Reporting, in a clear and concise manner, on the stuff we remember to report on, maybe, IF we remember.

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  • #171615

    syretha
    Moderator

    Knives Timeline: 1
    Fondant Timeline:2

    Also: OLYMPICS!!!!!

    #171619

    FATECreator
    Member

    Option 1 for both of them.

    Oh man those Hoodie Dragons were excellently designed!

    Fun fact: Although this is quite well known, did you know Junichi Masuda would go on to become the director for PKMN games starting in Gen 4 over at Gamefreak? He’s responsible for introducing the mechanic that would later be named after him called the “Masuda Method”. Take two Pokemon from two different (real world) regions (you can tell as the region is listed with a small mark on each Pokemon’s stat page) so Japan, Korea, North America, Germany, etc. and breed them together: the resulting offspring has a significantly higher chance of being a Shiny.

    “Reporting, in a clear and concise manner” wait…you mean you guys aren’t a joke news site? I feel…betrayed, how dare you lead people to assume you’re a joke news site when you’re in fact a factually correct and trustworthy news site! 0/10, I’m never coming back, and I’m not paying for this month’s subscription of the Mod Report in VR either!

    • This reply was modified 1 year, 5 months ago by  FATECreator.
    #171623

    K-16
    Member

    Good to hear that Mod Report Corporate has learned from their mistake, and is bringing back Mod Report classic. End the butchering!

    I like how Quazi put an effort into using both registered and unregistered trademark symbols into his message. Also is Atru always the angry one? I don’t remember Atru being the angry one of the mod group.

    And what the heck?! I know I chose option tw… *Reads Mod Report: Week 322.* …Ahem, never mind. Just clearing my throat.

    Welcome back isophist and glad you’re feeling a bit better now.

    isophist timeline: Option #1.
    aughts timeline: Option #3.

    We going Zelda levels of confusion here? With success and failure branches? Cause I’m liking this.

    (Oooooh what if aughts’ timeline is a mirror world, and through Wonderland physics of space and time, the two worlds could merge in even greater confusion?)

Viewing 3 replies - 1 through 3 (of 3 total)

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